News - Now working in Hastings too

I am very pleased to announce that I now have a practice in Hastings, East Sussex, just one day a week at the Wellington Centre. This doesn’t change my practising from Harley Street and Urban Bliss in Ladbroke Grove, just gives another option for my clients in East Sussex and Kent.

I was introduced to the Wellington Centre by Shirley Learthart, a Registered Nurse who gives Vital Signs health checks to help you prevent health issues before they start. From the moment I walked into the Wellington Centre I was struck by the beautiful ambience of the environment, and I was inspired by the opportunities to work with clients there.

The Wellington Centre is owned by Craig Sams and Josephine Fairley, founders of Green and Black’s Organic Chocolate. Situated in a Grade II listed Regency period building in the heart of Hastings, the centre provides a wealth of complementary therapies, pilates, yoga, workshops and a wonderful general ambience.

I shall be concentrating on offering my short solution focused therapy for Fear of Flying, Driving Test Nerves and Exam Nerves, Stopping Smoking in one session as well as my regular sessions.

I shall also be offering a more CBT-focused approach – CBT can very successfully be used as a therapy to examine, understand and change a whole range of issues that we can experience. Hypnotherapy complements CBT extremely well.

I’ll also be offering short group courses on Confidence Building and Assertiveness Training skills. These courses have already been running at SCOLA, the Adult Education Centre in Wallington, South London, and have been very successful.

My website is being updated within the next few days, but if you want to check out the centre in Hastings now, visit their website at www.thewellingtoncentre.com.

Self Help books - The Easy Way to Stop Smoking

A recent study reported by the British Psychological Society shows that in some cases, Self-Help books provide no help. Specifically, the study is looking into cognitive self help methods for sufferers of depression. But, it’s an interesting general idea.

Personally, I feel that Self-Help books can provide a useful tool, and for some people, an inspiration to really change in a positive way. However, reading about positive change is not the same as actually changing.

Therapists understand the problems that can be created by ‘intellectualising’ – the emotion-less thinking and rethinking about an event, action or anticipation can be a reason for never allowing change. While we are thinking about acting, we are not acting.

How many of us have read self help books, skipped over the exercises, thought quickly about some of the useful concepts and then ignored them. There is the problem – its no good just reading about what to do, we have to actually do it.

Therapy gives the client the real-life interaction with another individual who can identify intellectualising or other blocks to progress, point them out and help the client to overcome them.

I think that self-help books definitely do have a place for some, and I often recommend books to clients who might be interested in using them alongside the therapy sessions. Perhaps you might be interested in some of them too.

The first book I will mention in these posts is a real classic. It is not so much a self-help book as a book that uses the power of suggestion. Written in such a way as to gently persuade the reader to achieve what they wanted to achieve – the book is Allen Carr’s Easy Way to Stop Smoking.

Anyone considering stopping smoking could do much worse than spend the few pounds that this best selling paperback will set them back. Now an international bestseller, the book claims that reading it will allow you to be a happy non-smoker for the rest of your life. That may not be true for everyone perhaps, but I have met many people who have stopped smoking very easily after reading the book, so I strongly recommend it.

Lorna Cordwell 18 February 2010

Sources:

Carr, Allen “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking” (2009) Penguin Books

Haeffel (2010) “When self-help is no help. Traditional cognitive skills training does not prevent depressive symptoms in people who ruminate”

Get Past Driving Test Nerves

Available now on Amazon.co.uk and at bookstores

Get Past Driving Test Nerves

well, it has been a while, but I wanted to tell you about my new book that has just been published by Summersdale in the UK. Entitled "Get Past Driving Test Nerves" it is a book for anyone taking their driving test, or thinking about taking their driving test.

So why has a hypnotherapist written a book about driving? Because driving tests are one of the most stressful single experiences that many people encounter in their lives, and most people who fail their test don't fail because they can't drive well, they fail because of nerves.

The book spefically addresses the issue of nerves and how you can calm them before and during the test. it uses tried and tested techniques that I have been using for several years with clients who have come to see me for driving test nerves.

All the methods in the book can easily be used by the reader at home and there are lots of practical tips and advice too. Did you know for example:

- only 44% of tests are passed in the UK

- its common for people to say that they 'went to pieces on the day'

- the reason we feel nerves is because of a subconscious response called the 'fight or flight' mechanism

- this mechanism creates feelings of anxiety that are supposed to be useful, but in a test situation are anything but

- that you can alter these feelings by thinking differently about the test and by visually rehearsing the test

- visual rehearsal in a positive way is interpreted by the subconscious as a reality - in other words, if you take the test in your mind and pass it, your subconscious on some level believes that you have.

Many clients come to see me for driving test nerves, as well as other types of test, exam or presentation nerves. Usually we deal with this in one - three sessions. However, for those of you that would like another way, take a look at the book.

Get Past Driving Test Nerves
author: Lorna Cordwell
publisher: Summersdale
ISBN 978-1-84024-673-5

Sex, Lies and Hypnosis



Congratulations to Ursula James and Channel 5 (and to Dr Felix Economakis and BBC3) for at last presenting hypnotherapy accurately on TV. It is refreshing to see the media moving away from hypnosis for entertainment and 'shock value' and instead to show how life changing hypnotherapy treatment can be for people who are stuck with difficult issues.



One of the most commonly asked questions by my new clients or students is "is hypnosis like I've seen on TV? Usually meaning, will I have to bark like a dog, be made to do embarassing things, or reveal secrets that I don't want to?"



Hypnotherapy is none of these things, being a serious and well researched therapy to provide support to individuals who want change. Programmes like "Sex, Lies and Hypnosis" and "The Panic Room" are beginning to show this at last.



Of course, hypnosis is an interesting therapy as far as the cameras are concerned, and the addition of gadgets for the purpose of "good telly" is too tempting to avoid. I doubt that Ursula usually uses the CT scan headband (and assistant in the next room) to check that her clients are in hypnosis. The coloured peaks and troughs on the screen representing brain wave cycles are nice visually, but any well trained hypnotherapist knows when their client is in hypnosis without such obvious props.



Apart from that, is "Sex Lies and Hypnosis" an accurate representation of what might happen in a session? The answer, in the main, is yes.



Ursula is using a range of therapy techniques in the session, including visualisation and reframing devices, but the most obvious technique, and the most memorable from programme One, is regression. In regression the therapist is helping the client to return to what we call an Initial Sensitising Event - in other words, the root of the issue. Again, for the sake of "good telly", the client's distress at returning to an uncomfortable episode is shown graphically, with zoom shots of tears, fear, anger and frustration.



Let's be clear, that "Abreaction", as this release of emotions is called, is not always necessary or forthcoming. Often there is no Initial Sensitising Event, or there is a minor one, or a series of minor events. This often results in giving the client a new sense of awareness or self-realisation. Therefore, hypnotherapy is not always, by any means going to be experienced in such a strong way.



And, not all hypnotherapy uses regression - this is but one valuable technique that a well trained hypnotherapist will use. It will depend on the issue and the client whether the therapist decides to use regression, and this should always be with the express permission of the client after giving them a full understanding of what the process involves.



Having decided to use regression therapy, uncomfortable thoughts, feelings, emotions or anxieties can often disperse with remarkable ease and make real positive changes for people within a short space of time.



This is different from some traditional talking therapies. To use a simple metaphor, talking through issues can feel a little like our car breaking down. We can lift the bonnet and have a look and come to a conclusion about what is wrong with the car. Then we can call a mechanic who can stand with us as we both have a look and work out what is wrong with the car. However, until we roll our sleeves up and get our hands dirty to actually address the issue, that car is going to stay broken. Its one thing to be able to discuss what our feelings are, another to actually address them, face them and resolve them.



What I find sad about the "Sex Lies and Hypnosis" Programme is that the first episode showed a young couple who were really helped by the therapy. If they had not had the benefit of being part of the programme, I'm certain that they could not have afforded Ursula's (or any other private therapist's) fees. Even one or two sessions would have been out of the question for the couple who were struggling to pay for a new washing machine. Hypnotherapy is not offered on the NHS and rarely offered by Medical Insurance Providers.



For private practice, there is a wide range of fees charged by different therapists. A lower rate often indicates a newly-qualified (or student) therapist who might not have the confidence to deal with every issue that they are presented with. Effective therapy from an experienced therapist, therefore becomes quite an investment for some. Yet, as solution focused therapy, it has a lot to offer those who can benefit from it most. Organisations such as UKCP who register properly qualified hypno-psychotherapists, are helping to change this, but we still have some way to go.

stopping smoking - what we all know hypnotherapy is good for

Its getting close to the smoking in public places ban in England now, and of course the ban is already in place in Ireland, Scotland and Wales.

There seems to be a huge wave of activity from stores, businesses and the media encouraging smokers to quit. A few new products and medications are being released into the market and there is a general assumption that everyone will now want to quit.

The ban will of course persuade a few smokers to give up the dreaded weed, but perhaps this view is too simple.

I've helped many people to quit smoking and the most important aspect of successfully quitting is that they have to really want to stop. Sounds obvious, but actually we are not good at doing things under pressure - whether that be from family, friends, employers or the government. When we feel pressurised it can, in some cases make us want to smoke more.

One of the reasons why hypnotherapy is one of the most successful methods of quitting smoking (an independent study published in New Scientist magazine in 1992 showed that it was topped only by needing to quit urgently due to diagnosis of serious illness), is that a hypnotherapist will take time to help you discover your reasons for smoking.

If we are doing something that we know is harmful for us (very harmful in fact), that is not a natural thing to do, then we must have something in the back of our minds that tells us that it is a good idea, otherwise having done it once, we would never do it again. Anyone who has contracted serious food poisoning from eating a certain food in a certain restaurant is most unlikely to return and order the same dish again. It's instinct to avoid what harms.

If we make ourselves overcome the instinct that we are harming ourselves, then we must have a good reason for doing that. Gum, patches, medication, inhalers and going cold turkey don't address this issue, and for these reasons most have a very low success rate in helping people to quit.

People often ask me "does it work?" which is an interesting question. The answer is yes, but it depends on how you define "IT". Hypnotherapy works alongside your own mind, and it is your mind that is making the change, not the hypnotherapy. If we think back to times when we have "made up our mind about something", then change happens easily. And, even if we just focus on the hypnotherapy, hypnotherapy is not a constant. Hypnotherapists are trained at different schools, using different methods. They specialise in different areas, and have different levels of experience and knowledge. And, even if there were two hypnotherapists trained on the same course at the same time then they would still develop different styles.

Choosing hypnotherapy is not like using patches. Hypnotherapy will be different depending on which therapist you choose, and it is prudent to choose a therapist that you feel that you like. In the profession, we call this having rapport.

I guess there are hypnotherapists who read from a script, personally I never do. Suggestions are tailored individually for each client, and that means that the first part of any stop smoking session should allow the hypnotherapist and client to establish the important thought processes regarding smoking. These are:

a. why you want to quit smoking
b. why you have still continued smoking
c. why a. is now greater than b.

Some people just don't want to stop. Those people are not going to have their minds changed by a ban on smoking in public places. They will find other ways to smoke. However, the ban might just be enough to tip the balance between a. and b. above for a lot of other people.

And, let's face it, we can imagine things are much harder than they actually are. Smoking is, for many people, a really easy habit to break. Smoking can stop with no side effects and no cravings, and it can stop quickly too, not with any long drawn out supported reduction process. You might protest about this. If its so easy, why do we find it so hard to stop? Perhaps because we keep telling ourselves, and others, that it is hard to stop. Its part of the myth of smoking.

Let me tell you a story. A slightly strange one, I confess. For several years after I qualified as a hypnotherapist from the National College, I never treated smokers. The reason for this was that I was a smoker myself. I was a smoker who didn't want to quit. As a smoker I did not feel it was right for me to encourage people through hypnotherapy to quit, so I worked on other issues instead.

After smoking 20 - 30 a day for almost 20 years, I decided one day that I wanted to give up. I spoke this through with a friend, who said something very interesting to me. He asked me what I meant by "giving up", and he talked about another meaning of that phrase, which is to give up our problems to the higher self. As a therapist, this made perfect sense to me of course, so we did an exercise around that, which actually wasn't hypnosis because at that point I had not reached the place where I was completely ready to quit. We then decided that I should do nothing, and not even think about stopping smoking, but to carry on.

three weeks later I had an extraordinary dream, where I was in outer space talking to a large bright blue star. When I awoke, I knew instantly that I was a total non smoker. I had cigarettes in the house that remained untouched for a couple of days until I threw them away. Usually I would have smoked my first before leaving the house in the morning. I had no cravings, no side effects, it was simply as if I had never smoked. The only thing I noticed about smoking was an incredibly unpleasant smell. I could smell cigarettes from the other side of the street and realised how nauseating the smell is.

My sensitivity to the smell wore off after a couple of days, just as we get used to anything. That dream was over ten years ago now, and I have not touched a cigarette since. The decision in my mind was made, and therefore I simply changed. I've witnessed this effect many times since in clients that I've worked with, who have contacted me afterwards and told me how easy it was.

welcome...

It's very exciting having a new blog function on the website. I have been thinking how best to use it and I hope to use the opportunity to post thoughts, understandings and articles about different types of therapy techniques and methods that you find useful.

Further, I'll provide some thoughts on different issues that therapy can usefully treat and provide some individual thoughts on other methods that you might be interested in - for example, books and CDs that may be useful.

A good starting point though is perhaps to write about blogging itself. What is blogging? In one sense, it is not unlike working with a therapist. How so? Because it creates the space for us to express our thoughts and feelings without interruption.

Usually when we are in regular conversation with friends, family, colleagues, the conversation is two way and we spend as much time reacting to each other's thoughts and feelings as we do trying to express our own.

This can make it difficult to follow our own train of thought and when this happens we can end up feeling frustrated that we never really have the time to think through a problem we might be having. If we talk about it, often those we are talking to can either jump into the conversation too quickly to give their point of view, or they can use blocking devices such as "oh don't worry it will be alright". This kind of stops our thoughts in their tracks and means that we don't have enough opportunity to focus on issues that we want to focus on.

Blogging is similar to keeping a diary or a journal. We are, if you like just writing out into the world, to a listener who always listens and never interrupts. The difference of course is that usually with a diary, it is unread by anyone except the writer. A blog, on the other hand, can be read by anyone. But, similar to being in a large crowd, there is a degree of anonymity in knowing that the blog can be read by all and therefore it becomes almost private.

Therapy, whether it be hypnotherapy, psychotherapy, counselling psychology or counselling (and to a lesser extents other types of complementary therapies), gives us the chance to have a safe, private, confidential space in which to air our thoughts and concerns. Counselling skills focus on giving clients the opportunity to talk, to keep talking, to let the ideas flow and then to talk again - and to talk about those ideas, rather having to focus on what the other person is saying. A counsellor does not talk about his or her own issues or concerns. The therapeutic hour is all for the client.

Why is this valuable? Perhaps we don't even need to answer that question because we can feel the value of it. Our minds work in unique and complex ways. Give ourselves a little bit of an idea and our mind will run and run with it to a conclusion that feels right. Milton Erickson, grandfather of modern hypnosis, firmly believed that our inner mind (or our subconscious or unconscious mind) held all the resources we need to tackle any issue we might have. What this means is that he acknowledges that of all the experts in different disciplines, the best expert we have about ourself will always be ourselves. All we have to do is listen to what we are telling ourselves.

The best way to listen to what we are telling ourselves is to give ourselves the chance to express ourselves and then to listen to the message that we have expressed.

So there you have it. Blogging allows us to express ourselves and by doing so to feel that satisfaction that we have "got something off our chest", and that we have been able to allow ourselves to follow that train of thought to its logical conclusion. When do we know that we have reached that point? When we recognise that we have nothing else to say on the matter for the moment. Like now!